Your a redneck if... You know more than three recipes involving Doritos. 

Your a redneck if... Half of your phone bill is American Idol votes

Your a redneck if... You file your toenails with a belt sander.

Your a redneck if... You have ever hunted in your front yard.

Your a redneck if... You have ever served Thanksgiving dinner on a ping pong tabel.

Your a redneck if... You can burp the entire chorus of "Jingle Bells."

Your a redneck if... You have ever broke your jaw belching.

Your a redneck if... Your living-room curtains are beach towels.

Your a redneck if... You have ever used dynamite to scare the dog out from under a trailer.

Your a redneck if... You have ever broke your nose picking it.

Your  a redneck if... There is high stakes poker at your baby shower.

Your a redneck if... You are on the Hamburger Helper mailing list. 

Your a redneck if... Your idea of a romantic gift is His 'n' Hers camouflage vests.

Your a redneck if... Babysitters never work for you more than once. 

Your a redneck if... There is back ground gun fire on your answering machine greating.

Your a redneck if... You've head-butted a slot machine.

Your a redneck if...a episode of "Walker, Texas Ranger" changed your life.